tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-62381392382233333862024-03-12T23:51:56.124-07:00LOVE MULTIPLIED 3XA friend, sister, wife, mom of miracle triplets and a Pastor sharing thoughts on a life restored. My story began with struggle but with God, I am re-writing this end! I am after all a Daughter of a King...a woman in progress!
Follow us on Instagram: @RecoveryPastorsLA @BonnieXPowell
Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-33678999129068764222014-12-31T21:51:00.000-08:002014-12-31T21:52:06.839-08:00When I First Believed!<style>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">THE WALK</b></div>
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I was cleaning out closets when I ran across a photo
album of the year I studied in Spain. Here I found silly pictures and started
leafing through the pages of my past. So lost, alone and unaware. Then I found
it! The HOST! Yes, the very host (holy bread) blessed in church to eat as a
reminder of His death!! Oh the story!!! Tears filled my eyes and I cried for
that girl!!!</div>
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While living in Granada in my late teens early 20’s I had
been very lost and….searching. I found myself in a world with others on the
same journey. I did things teens sometimes do and in positions I stumbled upon.
One night, after an evening at some bars, we ended up at a Moroccan Tea shop
which are so very popular in Spain. A few hours of chai tea and smoking I
started a quiet, lovely and picturesque walk to my house. I was blessed to be
living with a host family that had a beautiful home right next to The
Alahambra and all it’s little shops and old churches. On my walk home I became
increasingly paranoid and couldn’t think straight. I quickened my pace and
thought about how much this street looked like a back lot of a studio. That it
was too picturesque and too perfect. I just knew it had to be a set up. I was so busy convincing myself that I was being watch that I
barely noticed it!</div>
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A host. Yes, a host…the big white round one with the cross
imprinted on it! Yes, the one a priest blesses as Christ’s body for us to
share… there on the floor, at 2am, in the dark, in Spain, on the street! What?
Surely this was part of the plot I was being set up for right? Paranoia grew.
Surely I was hallucinating this! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>Mental note: No more tea and smoking for me. So,
I kept walking but was getting closer to it and yet it didn’t disappear. Ah, a
brilliant thought! It wasn’t there was it? No, it couldn’t be! A plan: I’ll
step on it and prove to myself that it’s an illusion! So I walked and tried not
to look at it and stepped on it and took another step….I heard it! A very clear
and audible crunching sound!!! What??? I pivoted around and stared at it….now
behind me….cracked, with a clear shoe mark on it. Broken into two pieces………</div>
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I fell to my knee’s, tears fell down my face, and here….it
was my turn to break!!! Who was I? Lost, in a foreign country, unaware of
what my current actions would do in my life so many years later. I refused to
believe in this host, on the floor, so I challenged it’s existence. Yet, it
still lay there, now broken because of me! He loved me!!! Even if I refused to
believe in his existence and chose to challenge it by stepping on it….it
remained! I sat there crying and picked it up and ran home! </div>
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I’d like to tell you my life changed immediately and life was perfect from then on! I’d like to tell you that….but it wouldn't be true. It did take me a
little longer to understand however, that was the day <i><b>“that I first believed.” </b></i></div>
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Here I am 17 years later. On my living room floor, with 3
year old triplets running around and asking me what this white broken thing
was. The MERCY, the GRACE….how do I explain that to them? “Mami what’s that?”…..all
I could mutter… “A gift from God.”</div>
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How many times have we not taken His love, mercy, grace and favor for granted. Asking for more. Always wanting more. Not understanding the value and truth of what was already gifted to us. I am thankful for a God that despite our flaws loves us and meets us even in those dark deserted streets. You are never alone friend!!!</div>
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<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
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<b><i>"What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them
wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to
look for the one that wandered off?" </i></b></div>
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<b><i>Matt 18:12</i></b><span class="p"><br /></span></div>
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Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-13844683328059811142014-12-31T21:04:00.000-08:002014-12-31T21:18:18.282-08:00I'm Not Insulting You....I'm Describing You.<h3 style="text-align: center;">
</h3>
I saw this quote recently and was a bit taken aback or perhaps offended by it. It kept popping in my head for a few days so I decided to unpack it and figure out what it meant.<br />
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You can chose to read this in a few different ways:<br />
<ul>
<li><i>Through the eyes of hurt saying it to someone else</i></li>
<li><i>Through the eyes of offense at it being said about you</i></li>
<li><i>Through the eyes of revenge seeking to hurt</i></li>
<li><i>Through the eyes of betrayal feeling wounded</i></li>
</ul>
There was no particular situation this week that this could attach itself to but still it sat in my head. I felt a nudge. How would people describe me? Would I be surprised by the descriptions? Was I doing what my Father was asking?<br />
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See, I know I fail him daily but I try with all that I am to see that which is before me and act according to His will and not mine. Sometimes I get it right, sometimes I falter and yet other times I still find the rebel within me walking away. What would people say?<br />
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I found this a beautiful challenge. Not a co-dependent need to please others but a challenge of self. How do I want others to describe me? To really describe the nature of God I want them to see within me. I want them to see the best of a heavenly Father that has saved and loved me regardless of my faults. I want them to see the hope and life I have because of His love! I want them to ask me about Him!<i><b> </b>I want them to not see me or describe me but to<b> describe HIM WITHIN ME! So go ahead.....describe away!!!!</b></i><br />
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<span style="color: blue;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="color: blue;"><i>"Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.<span class="p">"</span>1 John 3:18</i></span></h2>
Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-79594332695436135072014-12-31T20:27:00.002-08:002014-12-31T20:42:33.074-08:00Life is Like A Mixed TapeHere I date myself.....<br />
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Anybody remember mixed tapes? Hours spent making them. Hours spent listening to them? Contemplating orders of songs and choices. What was the true message of this mixed tape? These were serious questions! You laugh but if you were a child of the 80's or even 90's you understand.<br />
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I find that at 40 life is so much like those mixed tapes. When life is going by it is important for us to always chose the next song. In this beautiful life you will find many adventures. Some welcomed with excitement and joy and others with a heavy heart simply endured. The great news is that we don't just have to sit back and wait for what "life" has for us because we know a God that has created us full of purpose and life! <br />
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<i><span style="color: blue;"><span style="background-color: white;">Don't live your life on Pandora...waiting to see what song they'll play and where "they" will take you. Take reigns of your life and make your own Mixed Tape</span></span></i><span style="color: #0000ee;"><i><span style="color: blue;"><span style="background-color: white;">.</span></span></i><span style="color: black;"> <span style="background-color: white;"></span> </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #0000ee;"><span style="color: black;">If life is giving you a valley with a slow beat you have the choice to change tune and make it the journey you imagine your Mixed Tape of life to be!!</span></span><br />
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Plan the next song and dance my friend!<br />
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<b><i><span class="arial12" style="font-family: arial,helvetica; font-size: small;"><span class="arial12" style="font-family: arial; font-size: small;"><span class="arial12"><span class="arial12">"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."-Psalm 30:5</span></span></span></span></i></b></div>
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Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-50373358655981326482014-12-31T20:15:00.003-08:002014-12-31T20:43:09.842-08:00Rose Bushes<h1 class="quoteText">
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“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”</i>- <span style="font-size: small;">Abraham Lincoln</span></h1>
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I never really liked roses. I never really understood why but I always knew.<br />
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When my husband and I started dating I asked him to never send me flowers. They just didn't mean to me what they meant to most girls. I'd prefer a box of chocolates thank you very much. So years went on like that. I never questions my discomfort with roses. They just annoyed me.<br />
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Recently we moved into a new home. A very pretty spanish style home that was cared by a lovely lady who loved roses. (of course) The entire front yard was riddled with roses bushes. Every color and all kinds! (I never even realized there were different kinds) I was annoyed by this view of my porch. So one day I decided to cut them down in preparation for a nice green lawn. I took shears and started cutting away.<br />
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A few bags later my husband walked by. I asked him what the point of such pretty things with such thorns!? It's then it all came to me. I rarely have moments where things hit me all at once but this was one of the rare few. I recalled going to buy flowers as a little girl with my Dad. Always believing they were for my mom and I but somehow they never made it home to us. He would say he never actually bought them or that they died in the car from sunlight. In this far memory I found the root of my distaste for roses. What flowers were meant to represent in our society as love and friendship actually represented betrayel and the feeling of not being "enough" for a man I loved.<br />
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There it was. So little. So simple. So sad. I finally realized that it was never about the roses but something the enemy had planted within me so many years ago. As I continued to cut these bushes that morning I said a simple prayer. "God, as I cut these out physically help me cut it out spiritually from where the roots grow. May no one ever plant what is not of you within my me. Give me the sight to pull it out not only of myself but of others around me!"<br />
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Funny thing.... a few weeks later I walked onto the porch to enjoy my coffee and saw that every single rose bush had regrown. Oh, but not just regrown but grown anew! Taller, fuller and brighter than before. So many little rose buds staring right at me! What???? <br />
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I started reading articles on rose bushes and came to find out that "You could never prune a rose bush in a wrong way." Why? Because it would simply outgrow the incorrect pruning and grow anyways!<br />
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It's simply beautiful how God will never allow his children to be pruned incorrectly and will always correct the mistakes and continue to grow us! <br />
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So again I quote:<br />
<h1 class="quoteText">
<i>“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”</i>- <span style="font-size: small;">Abraham Lincoln</span></h1>
Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-69018734353632599272014-04-24T08:24:00.001-07:002014-04-24T08:33:23.165-07:00Holy Spirit whispers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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As I was driving my kids to school this morning my daughter
asked if she could tell me a story. Now, at 7 years old there’s only so far
these stories normally go and they usually end the same however, this morning I
felt a whisper from the Holy Spirit to really hear. As I listened to her
story I was well aware that this story was exactly what God wanted me to hear
today. I would love to share this with you!</div>
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A story from my Leilani:</div>
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<i>“There was a little girl and she was really great at a lot
of things. People always told her she was great and she liked it. She could
sing, dance, act and was great at anything she did. One day she decided she
wanted to do a show for her family and friends because she was so wonderful at
so many things. She practiced and worked really hard. On the day of the show
she did everything amazing and was so excited at the end when she took a bow for
her friends and family but she didn’t hear a single applause or cheer. She didn’t
understand and was confused until she looked up and looked to see why and then
she noticed that during her entire show she forgot one single thing…..to open
the curtain!”</i></div>
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Isn’t it funny how we all get caught up into thinking we are
skilled, gifted or purposed at something when others applaud us? If we don’t keep
our focus on God we begin to think it’s all about us and that we don’t need
anyone’s help! How great would it have been if this little girl allowed her friends
and family to be part of the show and depend on someone she trusted to open up
that curtain! </div>
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The great works we do are nothing if we do not include
others in the progress and if we forget to open the curtain what is it all for?
Do you have people in your life helping you improve your story? People that
hold the crucial role of opening up the windows and doors of your life for
others to see the wonders God has done? God created us for community and one
talented person will never go as far as a group of talented people! So invite your
friends to the beautiful story you are writing and make it a beautiful show for
all to see!</div>
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<i><span id="goog_1301361240"></span>Thank you to my little Leilani for the story that opened my
heart today! And thank you Holy Spirit for your quiet prompting whispers!!! <span id="goog_1301361241"></span></i></div>
Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-77457393237418830822013-11-26T00:11:00.000-08:002013-11-26T06:49:01.758-08:00"I can do all things through CHRIST who strengthens me!" ..so run!!Hello friend,<br />
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This is a letter to you. Yes, you. I want to remind you that you can do everything you want. Maybe someone, something, somewhere in the past told you that you couldn't and you started believing it. I did. Well friend, they lied to you! The devil is a liar! (John 8:44)<br />
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A true friend will always tell you the truth out of love. One of my biggest desires is to see all my friends fulfill the dreams God gave them long ago. Why? Simply because someone did it for me a long time ago and my life has been forever changed!<br />
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Maybe you're a student with a full load, a stay-at-home mom caring for your family, a working woman learning the ropes, a successful career focused chick, a young girl lost & searching for the right purpose, a hard working mom or a single mom just trying to do it all. The truth is, I have all of these ladies in my life and I LOVE it!!!<br />
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<b><u>Here's a brief list of some of my friends: </u></b><br />
<ul>
<li>SHE lay her career down to raise her baby & help her husband with his business.</li>
<li>SHE followed her husband across the ocean to be closer to him as he serves our country.</li>
<li>SHE just had her second baby and loves them dearly but can't wait to get back to work.</li>
<li>SHE had her third baby and stepped back into a busy career caring for others.</li>
<li>SHE is a full time Doctorate student, employee & encourager...all while taking the bus!</li>
<li>SHE is a busy ER nurse and uses her testimony to witness to many.</li>
<li>SHE is a single mom working a demanding career and raising her kids alone.</li>
<li>SHE is lost and searching but determined to stay connected with healthy women.</li>
<li>SHE left to Africa to become a missionary in her 40s.</li>
<li>SHE refused to let her addiction overtake her & now coaches young women.</li>
<li>SHE dedicates her life to loving the homeless and marginalized.</li>
<li>SHE refuses to let the past keep her chained & chooses freedom on a daily basis. </li>
<li>SHE refuses to be broken and continues to search for purpose and calling.</li>
<li>SHE works full time, takes care of her family and is determined to make a difference. </li>
<li>SHE is single but does not worry and focuses on her purpose & career. </li>
<li>SHE homeschools and sets her family up for a win while leading other moms to health.</li>
<li>SHE refuses to let cancer define her life even in the midst of chemotherapy.</li>
<li>SHE runs the good race! (1 Corin 9:24) </li>
</ul>
Maybe you see yourself in this list or in several of these women. Congratulations my friend, you are doing it all through CHRIST who strengthens you. The lie from the past has no hold on you. The truth is friend, you can do what <i><u><b>you choose</b></u></i> to do. The question is, <u><i><b>are YOU choosing to do it</b></i></u><i><b>? </b></i><br />
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I would love to challenge you. The question does not rest on your "capacity" but on your focus and determination to just <b>DO IT</b>. Is something holding you back from just going for it? Is it fear of failure? If you at least give it a shot then you stand a chance! <br />
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The difference between what I could have become and what I am was all weaved through choices. I grew up in East Los Angeles, child of immigrant parents, abused and with addictive tendencies. I had to set my focal point high and <i>run</i>! There were no mentors, coaches or leaders that took me under their wing but I knew there was a need for them and that one day I would bridge that gap.<br />
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So today, when you see me busy with a full time ministry, a mom of triplets, a wife, a friend, a student, a mentor and a pretty darn good cook....don't compare, don't judge and don't suppose that it's a front. I am no better than you, I don't have a larger "capacity" (whatever that's suppose to mean), I didn't have more means than you, it's not a facade. All I did friend, was choose to <b><i>believe the word of God </i></b>and not the enemy that I could do it all and I ran! You can too! Your "all" may look different than mine and at the end of the day, only you and God can judge what lane you choose. <b>So look up my friend AND RUN!!!</b><br />
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<i>One last piece of advise that I'll share that a wise person once told me.... "you can do it all but that doesn't mean you have to do it all....<b>right now.</b>"<b> </b>....Of course the latina comes out of me wanting to ask... "Right now, right now? or just right now." (this is only funny if you know George Lopez or any members of my Cervantes family!) and there you have it, another little crazy side of me! </i><br />
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See you on the journey! <br />
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<b><i>****THANK YOU to all my beautiful friends represented in this post. your example and friendship fuels my soul! I live vicariously through the stay-at-home mom, the single girl searching for purpose and the women in the midst of the battle but choosing to fight the good fight! My life is full because of you!*****</i></b>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-75417052884834802882013-11-25T11:56:00.001-08:002013-11-25T16:49:41.219-08:00This is the BEST LIFE! <i> <span class="text Jer-29-11" id="en-NIV-19647">"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." </span>Jeremiah 29:11</i><br />
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During the holiday seasons we all need a little reminder of the great plans God has for each one of us. Whether you're on a beautiful mountain peak or a lonely valley remember, HIS plans for you never change! The enemy is an expert on confusion but you my friend...are an expert on how HE loves you!<br />
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<b>So go LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE! </b><br />
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Even this in-love wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter and Pastor can use a reminder once in a while!<br />
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<br />Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-61315565985105755762013-09-24T13:18:00.000-07:002013-09-24T15:25:10.412-07:00What's In Your Suitcase?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHyG3CAauMlFHNja_PKM-gXM4bilDcrPUxcnLpiEp8i6jjI_ob9wR_IoWHQhcshgt-8KT0r86a5fLDCLfOC9E3saQ7zFI1GFUzdBeISm-RIxOeoGXO4hIaKB8mpqX1LI9nuS7aX3zY8fM/s1600/Cancun2009+070.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHyG3CAauMlFHNja_PKM-gXM4bilDcrPUxcnLpiEp8i6jjI_ob9wR_IoWHQhcshgt-8KT0r86a5fLDCLfOC9E3saQ7zFI1GFUzdBeISm-RIxOeoGXO4hIaKB8mpqX1LI9nuS7aX3zY8fM/s1600/Cancun2009+070.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
My husband is such a hassle-free kind of guy and it shows in all he does.<br />
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One day we were traveling for a holiday with our then 4 year old triplets and he really disliked having to lug around tons of suitcases. On our previous trips I always packed:<br />
<ul>
<li>1 large suitcase for Mom & 2 girls</li>
<li>1 large suitcase for dad & son (since it's half empty I'd throw in some favorite snacks & pool toys here)</li>
<li>Each kid would have their own rolling pack with toys & entertainment for the plane</li>
<li>1 backpack for mom</li>
<li>1 backpack for dad</li>
<li>1 extra carry on with emergency clothes</li>
</ul>
I think that load is pretty reasonable for a family of 5 traveling for 10 days! He disagreed and considering poor dad was left to drag them all around airports and hotels while I herded kids and got us where we needed to be I decided to let him have it his way!<br />
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On the following trip we decided to head back to our honeymoon spot of Jamaica! Oh, how excited I was to be back and to share it with my then 5 year old kids! My loving husband reminded me about the horrible suitcase situation and challenged me to only use 1 large suitcase for the ENTIRE family! It is here that God reminded me of the strain my poor husband went through with those bags! Ugh, so with a "smile" I said yes to both of them!<br />
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First things first! What do we NOT need to take!? I started taking out snacks (triplets are big enough to eat whatever is available), floaties (they knew how to swim now), blankies (big kids, no more need for those) & books (downloaded on ipads). Ok that's as good as it gets baby!!! Once I took these things off the list and realized that all I needed to pack was clothes....MY LIFE CHANGED!!!!!<br />
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No more carrying around loads of "<i>things</i>" that I may or may not need. "Things" that somehow brought a false sense of comfort. "Things" that caused distractions. "Things" that hindered us from moving freely. "Things" that tied us down. "Things" we held onto because of dependency. What freedom!!!!!!<br />
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Once I sat there and stared at the empty suitcase on the floor and the mounds of clothes still to pack I realized.....we don't even "need" these mounds of clothes! 5 sundresses per girl, 2 bathing suits and tons of underwear! 4 shorts for boys, 5 shirts, 2 pool shorts and tons of underwear! There, we were packed!! AND GUESS WHAT....HALF THE SUITCASE WAS STILL EMPTY!<br />
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<i>What a perspective on my life! Given the right <u>direction</u>, <u>challenge</u> and <u>vision</u> we can all leave "things" behind that no longer serve us!<b> </b></i><b><u>Matthew 11:30 tells us "For my yoke is easy and burden is LIGHT.</u>"</b><i><b> </b>So how many years, detours, frustrations and tears have these "things" caused us? My friends, how easily we get fooled into believing that we need anything other than God with us. We need to stop and inspect our suitcases! </i><br />
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<i>These "things" we carry with us <u>slow us</u> on our JOURNEY because of their weight and <u>keep us</u> from our PURPOSE because of the fatigue caused by the weight. So why do we insist on lugging around unforgiveness, hurts, bitterness, resentment and hate? Who is truly choosing to pack these things in our suitcase AND on top of that who is sitting on them to make it all fit? The answer is us! We have the power to speak to that which we choose not to carry any longer! </i><br />
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<i>So take a moment today, inspect your suitcase and throw out what is not serving you on your journey! <b>If it does not propel you forward it holds you back! SO GO UNPACK & TRAVEL LIGHT!!!!!!</b></i><br />
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<i><b>Isaiah 58:8 </b></i><i><b><span class="text Isa-58-8" id="en-NLT-18771">“Then your salvation will come like the dawn</span><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-58-8">and your wounds will quickly heal.</span></span><span class="text Isa-58-8"> Your godliness will lead you forward,</span><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Isa-58-8">and the glory of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> will protect you from behind."</span></span> </b></i><br />
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<b>Psalm 30:2</b><br />
<i><b>O Lord my God, I cried to You and You have healed me.</b></i><br />
<br />Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-58767206645985955972012-05-21T19:28:00.002-07:002013-09-24T13:52:21.874-07:00Three Minutes...to change your life.A few months ago we were challenged by our Pastor to share our lives testimony in three minutes or less. The prayer was to share our story and impact others through the journey we had each been on.<br />
Though I had been doing it on a daily basis with individuals it took on a new life as I carefully crafted what God wanted me to share. You see, the devil had been after me since I was three years old and I spent most of my life pretending nothing was wrong. I had the world convinced but the world within me was crushed.<br />
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My life took so many twists and turns that there really was no real place to start. How do you bring someone in on a roller coaster ride that's already started? But that's just what God did. 12 years ago He stepped into my roller coaster and changed the course of my life. Not only did He free me from a past but prepared me for a future with a strength I had never known.<br />
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Two years after becoming a Christian my husband and I experienced the biggest blow yet. The difference this time was that the wind was knocked out of me but not the life! I knew the promises over my life and this was most definitely not the end! When I couldn't breath He breathed life into me! As I peel back all the layers.... I see the impact each layer has to those around me and the freedom in knowing they are not alone. And sometimes knowing that you are not alone is all that it takes.<br />
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<span class="text Gen-50-20" id="en-NIV-1527"> So today I freely share my "Three minute Testimony" and the intro </span><span class="text Gen-50-20" id="en-NIV-1527">goes something like this:</span><i><span class="text Gen-50-20" id="en-NIV-1527"><br /></span></i><br />
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<i>"Hi, my name is Bonnie and I'm a grateful believer in Jesus Christ. I am a survivor abuse, 12 years sober of chemical dependency and recovering from food addiction." </i><br />
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Of all the amazing and wonderful things we plan to do, say and risk in our lives
this has been the most impactful in mine. Shedding light into what the enemy had wanted
to keep in the dark and claiming freedom from a past that has
nothing to do with my future.<br />
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What layer are you working on?<br />
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<b>Genesis 50:20</b><br />
<b><i><span class="text Gen-50-20" id="en-NIV-1527">You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, <u>the saving of many lives.</u></span></i></b><br />
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<br />Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-20727169754469164382012-05-08T18:23:00.001-07:002012-05-09T10:53:19.720-07:00Abundance... The journey thru In Vitro Fertilization<style>
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My husband and I have beautiful 6-year-old triplets. They are
one of the biggest joys of our lives. A true gift that we praise God for and
thank Him on a daily basis. From afar the picture looks so complete. A great
marriage, 3 kids, 1 dog, a house and fulfilling careers in ministry but make no
mistake there were blind faith walks that got us here. </div>
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When we decided it was time to have children we had been
married for 1 year and dating for 5 years. So we felt comfortable walking into
this next phase of our lives. I had a great up-and-coming career at a large
entertainment studio, he was teaching and an actor in Hollywood. How fun it was
going to be!! We did all the responsible things and off we went. By sheer
happenstance we quickly realized that this dream was not going to happen on its
own. Due to health issues that arose we found ourselves in a very dark and
heartbroken place. (<i>details to follow in a future blog</i>)</div>
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We had been Christians for 5 years and living our lives
fully for God’s leading and yet the enemy seemed to be trying to tie us to the
sins of our past. After a lot of praying, searching, education and tears we
knew that we knew God’s promise for our lives. </div>
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<i>Isaiah 54: 1-3</i></div>
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<i><span class="textisa-54-1">Sing, O childless woman,</span> <span class="textisa-54-1">you who have never given birth. Break into loud and joyful
song, O Jerusalem</span><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="textisa-54-1">you who have never been in labor.</span> <span class="textisa-54-1">For the desolate woman now has more children</span> <span class="textisa-54-1">than the woman who lives with her husband,</span><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="textisa-54-1">says the </span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span><span class="textisa-54-1">.</span><span class="textisa-54-2">Enlarge your house; build an addition.</span></i>
<i> <span class="textisa-54-2">Spread out your home, and spare no expense!</span> <span class="textisa-54-3">For you will soon be bursting at the seams.</span> <span class="textisa-54-3">Your descendants will occupy other nations</span> <span class="textisa-54-3">and resettle the ruined cities.</span></i></div>
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Now choosing IVF was not an easy and quick decision and many
factors play into this decision. For us, we felt like the answer was “go”.
During this journey we had three “rounds” of ivf. The way it works is that they
manipulate your body to “over ovulate” in order to work with the most viable
eggs produced. The first two rounds proved to be successful and fruitful but
unfortunately both of these resulted in later miscarriages. A devastating loss
but through it we knew that we knew the promise for us. The third “round” we
knew would be our last…at least for a while. We were financially depleted and
emotionally weary. </div>
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We started the argyrous journey of doctors visits, tests,
injections, tests, doctors visits all covered in prayer and belief. Two days
before the actual procedure my Doctor called. He was a kind and compassionate
man and wanted to let me know that this round had not produced the amount of
eggs they would have hoped for. He suggested we stop the process, give my body
a break and start over in a few months. I was speechless. The first round had
produced 13 eggs and the second round 11 and this round was barely holding on
to 6. This was not the direction I was promised!! I did what I knew to do….I
fell on my knee’s and prayed! I cried out to our heavenly Father and asked him
for direction. I cried from a deep sense of sorrow and told him that I would
follow regardless of how I felt because I trusted His ultimate answer and
believed His promise to us.</div>
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While I was praying I heard a quiet prompting question….<b><i> “Do
you only trust me in abundance? Who do you think I AM?</i></b>” I knew instantly what
my answer was. I called my husband and told him the entire story. I told him
that our God does not have limits and that I trusted with little and knew he
did not need more of anything to respond. So we agreed to continue and that
whatever the answer was we would feel like we had been obedient and would give
God the following year to speak to us. </div>
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We flew to New York and went through with the round. We
explained to our Doctor that we had resolved to believe His ultimate answer for
us and were at peace but needed to be obedient with what was in our hands.
After all, all you need is a mustard seed. Needless to say that on this round
we fell pregnant again! Now the journey to get through the first trimester
without another loss, but this time was different and we knew it! </div>
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Here we are 7 years later with our 6 year-old TRIPLETS that
sprung from a place of “little” into a house full of abundance!!! God needs
nothing to bless you but your faith and obedience. Abundance does not enlarge
any “chances” because He is after all the Creator of it all. So even when it
seems like you have less than required, when your faith is weak, when your walk
is slow and when your prayer is a whisper…He still hears and abundance comes
from Him alone!</div>
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<i>Isaiah 54:13</i></div>
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<i><span class="textisa-54-13">I will teach all your children,</span>
<span class="textisa-54-13">and they will enjoy great peace.</span></i></div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-5575163533901639752012-05-08T17:49:00.002-07:002013-09-24T13:52:57.499-07:00The weight of the world!I’m sure you have all heard the phrase of “<u>carrying the weight of the world</u>” and perhaps even felt like that a few times. I was recently having a conversation with someone and they used this phrase. It stuck out to me for several reasons.<br />
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1. <i>The weight that we each carry differs in intensity but it’s never the “weight of the world” on our shoulders….just the weight of our world. </i>Funny how we go through our own struggles and believe it to be the most difficult thing being carried out on the planet earth! Why do we dramatize it more than we need to?<br />
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2. <i>Weight varies depending on your scale.</i> Some stumbling blocks on my journey can be devastating to me but just a mere bump on the road to others and vise versa. Depending on how much work you have put into the “stabilizer” of your life will determine the outcome of the heaviness felt. So what scale are we measuring on?<br />
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3. <i>You always have the choice to drop the weight</i>. Most of the stuff I have carried around has been (if I’m truly honest and raw) by choice. Some of it I understand we carry because we are unaware of it but most of the pressure comes from the one we actually chose to continually carry even when we do become aware of it. Who said you had to carry it?<br />
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Now I don’t mean to minimize our responsibilities but I wonder if we pressure ourselves to carry what is not ours out of a sense of guilt. Perhaps we had a part that we played in creating the problem, maybe we didn’t act and therefore still feel responsible to the situations outcome, are we ashamed of what has transpired and our role in it, do we not trust God with it?<br />
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These are all just questions I asked myself.
For years I carried the weight of the abandonment of my dad. I felt like I had to be all things to all people to account for his void. I pressured myself to be more present for my mother and brother and to sooth things for the family. It left me bitter, resentful and just plain tired. Until one day I threw it at the foot of Jesus… and yes, I threw it! I was so tired of carrying it that I just tossed it one day full of tears. That was the day that I realized that my heavenly father had never asked me to carry this load nor was it mine to carry. I chose to pick it up and try to fill a spot that I was never made to fit into.<br />
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Later in my journey I found I was carrying around a physical weight. A weight that masked (very badly may I say) my feelings of unworthiness of places and positions God himself had appointed me to.
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<i>Hebrews 12:1 says: “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us <u>strip off every weight that slows us down</u>, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.” </i><br />
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Is holding the “weight of your world” more important than running your race? How far will you get if you’re slowed by distractions that were not meant for your eyes?
How the enemy likes to deceive us and confuse us by believing we are demi-Gods to solve what is not in our power to solve!<br />
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This weight is nothing but a distraction!! The devil is so scared by what God has empowered you to do that he sends distractions on the journey to keep you from the finish line. The “weight” is mean to slow you down and tire you out before you accomplish what is yours to accomplish and what you were perfectly purposed for! Drop the weight…run…..take the speed you had lost in your life and leave he weight behind…. <u>He’ll carry it for you</u>!<br />
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After all, aren't we promised: <br />
<b>"For my yoke is easy and <u>my burden is light.</u>" Matthew 11:30</b><br />
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<br />Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-83413442262361294902012-03-28T18:21:00.002-07:002012-03-28T18:22:42.544-07:00To prepare or not to prepare???Have you ever had one of those days where you slept in a little too long, took a little too much time picking an outfit, forgot you needed gas, took the wrong freeway, needed to stop at the atm, forgot something & had to go back and my personal favorite....forgot to put on your shoes!??? Well, it happens to the best of us.... or shall I say the unprepared of us.<br />
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As a wife, mom, employee, daughter, friend ....I have plenty on my plate. My day goes like this:<br />
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5:00am - first alarm; 5:05am - second alarm; 5:15am - last alarm!!<br />
5-6am - time with God & coffee<br />
6-630am - get dressed<br />
630-7am - pack lunches for triplets & make breakfast<br />
7-730am - encourage (help) triplets get dressed, brush hair/teeth<br />
730am-8am - breakfast, pray with kids, practice memory verse<br />
810am- drop kids off at school<br />
815am- drive to work and start my real day! <br />
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Tired? me too!!! And that's just the first 3 hours of my day! What you don't see is that the night before I have laid out ironed uniforms, signed notes, packed back packs, pre-set lunch options and prepared dinner for next day. Even God prepared us:<br />
<b>Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. <i></i></b><br />
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Yeah, it's a lot but lets think about it. When you fail to prepare yourself then how will you ever be ready? When I'm busy ironing uniforms the night before I know that this is setting me up for the journey of tomorrow. It may only win me a few minutes but it gives me those extra minutes to talk to a friend, to be a listening ear, to prepare for that meeting, to take extra time to pray, to call a loved one, to solve a problem, to just be in the moment and allow that "tug" of the holy spirit into my life! We pray for ears to hear and eyes to see but if we're busy rushing from one place to the next..... how will you see? Will it just be a blurred vision as you rush on by? <i><b>Proverbs 31:27</b> She watches over the affairs of her household<br />
and does not eat the bread of idleness</i>.<br />
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Preparing today for tomorrow may just buy you that extra few minutes that may just change your life.....and I don't want to be late for that appointment! <br />
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Now... go set your clocks!!!! Set three if you have to...I do!<br />
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Matthew 25:13<br />
Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour.Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-27389247889276585342012-03-20T12:46:00.001-07:002012-03-20T12:56:50.622-07:00Back painFor the last 6 months I have been experiencing a severe back pain. The kind that you think you pulled something so you go for adjustments and countless massages and it keeps creeping back. I finally got so sick of it I went to the Dr and of course his solution was medication. Um, excuse me...I've been clean for 11 years and would like option #2 please! So I insisted on an XRay and he found a beginning case of early Arthritis and suggested steroid shots. Great! No thank you....let me fall flat on my face and ask for healing!<br />
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So here I have been for 6 months. Either flat on my face believing in a healing or flat on my back from pain. Today I finally got the revelation that through this God was speaking to me again....shock, I know!!! <br />
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I've been praying for a refreshed FAITH recently. Not that I've lost it but I want the flames to be fanned and for it to be burning hot in my life. Well, this morning I felt God telling me..... GET OFF YOUR BACK GIRL AND GO! Perhaps not the healing I was praying for but definitely a direction!! Yes, my back hurts but what do I gain from laying around here and what is it stopping me from doing? No longer gonna lay on my back but be on MY FACE or on my feet....walking towards that purpose! Walking in healing and with that <i>refreshed faith<b></b></i> that I am healed! The faith that I can walk past the pain and into the passion of life He has created for me!<br />
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Scripture to lean on:</b><br />
2 Corinthians 12:9-10<br />
"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-70187017885780689862012-03-18T19:37:00.000-07:002012-03-18T19:37:52.077-07:00FaçadesGrowing up in my culture and time it was always important to keep up appearances. Even if you or your family was having a bad day it was your family responsibility to put on a good face. Façades of life...something I learned to carry on regardless of the pain I was in.<br />
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As a young adult my pendulum swung the complete opposite way. If I liked you then you knew it and if I didn't then you knew it too! Not much for tact, grace or manners. I felt as if I had not time to play "pretend" anymore as my childhood was spent in this way. Soon I realized this too was not serving me well. I had very few friends and felt like I was placing my hurt on others. <br />
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Now I live my life as if in a glass house. You do get what you see and there are no hidden intentions or agendas. I live my life for others to see that there is hope in Christ. That regardless of your past you can live through it and not just survive with a facade but live a full life. Walk through the rooms of my life and witness the miracles I have seen! Feel free to touch the doors, sit on the furniture and have a cup of coffee. If you have a minute I can tell you my story, my miracles and about God's love.<br />
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PS... I don't have decaf! (wink)Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-56210226069188932682012-03-18T19:24:00.000-07:002012-03-18T19:24:45.047-07:00How do you think?"The difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is how they think." -John Maxwel<br />
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How do I think? I believe this has a lot of power and our chosen capacity. People always ask me how I do it. Full time job, wife, mom to 5 year old triplets, graduate student, friend, mentor, sister etc. Reality is that I wouldn't give any of these hats up. I prayed for every single one of them and to now turn around and say "I can't do it all" or "It's too much" what would that mean? Every single one of these roles fills me, inspires me and allows me to walk in my purpose. It's so easy to stand on a prayer:<br />
"God bless me with a job, bless me with a loving husband, bless me with a family, bless me with great friends, bless me with purpose!!!"<br />
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Does any of that prayer sound familiar? Perhaps because it is a prayer we all pray at times. To now look at my life and let it overwhelm me would be thankless for the beautiful blessings I was on my knees for.<br />
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This world likes to make us forget that our blessings can become burdens and hold you back. I would like to remind you of the opposite....they are your miracles! It's all in the power of how you think...so think again my dear friend!<br />
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Scriptures to lean on:<br />
Philippians 4:13<br />
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-31797461934730117272012-03-18T19:16:00.000-07:002012-03-18T19:16:21.281-07:00The sun is up SOMEWHERE!!Sometimes we find ourselves going through difficult times and feel forgotten by God and struggle to hear Him in our lives. I would like to encourage you.<br />
The sun may be down on your side of the world but guess what??? It's up somewhere in the world!! <br />
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The great thing is that they have discovered that the earth rotates....that the earth is round.....and soon it will be our turn to be in the sun....so hold on because Gods moving you and the sunrise is coming!<br />
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I guarantee you that this the moment it does, it will take your breath away!<br />
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Scripture to lean on:<br />
Romans 8:24-25 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-28818584265001496942012-03-18T19:12:00.000-07:002012-03-18T19:12:23.586-07:00Fathers"Your earthly father may have failed you but your heavenly father will never leave you & He will fill the void." -Philip Wagner www.philipwagner.com<br />
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I had never heard a more healing statement. This was a man, my Pastor asking for forgiveness for the offenses another earthly man had committed in my life. This was a man standing in a gap that perhaps my own dad would not be able to stand upon in his lifetime. Not only did he allow me to begin to let go of the pain and sadness but he did a great favor to my earthly dad. The one that hurt me the most, the one I continue to pray for, the one that God cries for......as a lost son.<br />
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What my Pastor did was stand is gap that my earthly father has not been able stand in...on his own and perhaps one day my dad will start a relationship with God. There he will find forgiveness. Forgiveness that I have already granted in my own heart because of this man, this Pastor. And when he does, if he gets to meet my Pastor ...he can thank his brother for standing in that gap for him.<br />
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I now challenge myself...to stand in someone else's gap.Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-37858726064918269032011-10-21T18:05:00.000-07:002011-12-01T00:00:26.475-08:00PUT A (NEW) RING ON IT!It's now been 14 months since I started this health journey. This Thanksgiving one of my wedding rings fell off my finger and was lost for a day. I realized how loose they were a week ago and was thinking I should have them adjusted...but of course time alluded me for that. <br />
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For years I have been blessed to serve God under an amazing leader who battled her own health journey and armed herself with all the knowledge of leading a healthy life. And yes, I have been listening and this entire time I have been getting healthy on the spiritual and emotional side and not really thinking about the physical side. Now this physical side has come into alignment once again.<br />
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The one thing I realized is that my self confidence has somehow failed me. Let me explain.<br />
Being confident in who I am, who I want to be and who God has designed for me to be has never been an issue for me. However, because of this confidence I have somehow failed to see some very obvious things in front of me.<br />
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Funny how the thing that makes you strong actually makes you weak. <br />
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I can remember that during my entire life I have always been confident in who I was. Regardless of what size I wore I knew I could do anything I focused on and desired to. My confidence always attracted friends and always kept me at the top of my class. Now I can look back and see where this confidence actually failed me in other ways. I was asking my husband about what he thought of my confidence when we met and he admitted that he was attracted to me because I always knew who I was and what I wanted and where I was going. He wanted to go on that ride too! lol! <br />
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So, this confidence could have very much saved my life as a little girl, helped me cope, pushed me to be the best at school, made me look for challenges and led me to my dear husband. But at some point there comes a moment of inspection to see where this confidence can also make me weak and allow myself a moment of humility where I can grow.<br />
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I heard a trainer say "Pain is weakness leaving your body." I had to sit and chew on how profound this actually was. It reminded "For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." (2Timothy 1:7)<br />
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Maybe mine was just a bit misguided and lacking of self-control but the confidence came from God, grown through some pain and now living in a body filled with strength! Now if I can only get my rings adjusted.....or have my husband "PUT A RING ON IT' ....as an encore of course! ;) <br />
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<u><b>Scriptures to lean on:</b></u><br />
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</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Psalm 27:3 </span></div><h3 style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: small;">Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war arise against me, yet I will be confident. </span></h3><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Joshua 1:9</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the </span><span class="sc" style="font-size: small;">Lord</span><span style="font-size: small;"> your God is with you wherever you go.”</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXTn6jzx5F8rHhFTt9DpX9aBMYDeB3RfOjHa2SbirjKO9nOuQrGuVZMb0XyoAQicencNTkAasGgu_G1AU5xpfURjCrr1oTze0kac2Ap9nJYBkgfVeKXjplNkFqJ3TmHdeeGF7imBjg9bo/s1600/IMG_0675.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXTn6jzx5F8rHhFTt9DpX9aBMYDeB3RfOjHa2SbirjKO9nOuQrGuVZMb0XyoAQicencNTkAasGgu_G1AU5xpfURjCrr1oTze0kac2Ap9nJYBkgfVeKXjplNkFqJ3TmHdeeGF7imBjg9bo/s200/IMG_0675.jpg" width="150" /></a></div><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">ps... if Daddy wont... my son will! :) </span></div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-42082916081146528492011-10-15T11:54:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:51:15.305-08:00Carry the LoadSo I have to admit I'm a bit of a princess at home. My husband has spoiled me and he kindly pointed it out.<br />
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Our home has multiple levels and sometimes a heavy laundry basket can't seem to make it's way down the stairs or up the stairs. I put it in the middle of the walk way to clue him in to carry it for me to the location I need it in. He came home one evening and a basket was waiting for him at the foot of the stairs to carry up. He walked into our room with the basket and asked... "How do these baskets make it up and down on their own when I'm not around? You are not weak, sometimes you just choose to be." and with that he set me in place!<br />
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Ha, such a little comment about a silly basket but it actually hit me to heart. How many times have I been fully equipped to do something but refuse to lean on the strength growing within and wait for the "savior" to help us carry the load. Society, culture our very own self keeps us tied to an identity of weakness that is not ours to hold. I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME! (Phil 4:13) <br />
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I gained 89 pounds, mostly in my belly, with the triplets and when Doctors urged us to "reduce" (medical term for abortion) in order to give the other two a better chance at survival I didn't flinch and instantly understood...<i>"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb." </i>(Psalm 139:13) This 5 foot frame carried triplets with no high blood pressure, no gestational diabetes, no anemia and no preeclampsia...the question is, what can't I do?!<br />
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Sometimes you just forget and need someone to put you in your place! Gotta go.....there's a basket with my name! ;)Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-9727009273795589362011-10-03T23:00:00.001-07:002011-11-30T23:52:06.075-08:00THE "F" WORD<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">So, as many of us do…today I was trying to clean house. I have become such an expunger and need to rid myself of excess furniture, clothes, shoes, trinkets and clean house! I ran across our triplet stroller and decided to post it in Craigs List. Soon, I was contacted by a pregnant mom who was in the early stages of her triplet pregnancy and had a few questions. She was interested in the stroller but also was contemplating “reduction” (medical term for early abortion as a means to save the other multiples) as recommended by her Doctor. She asked me how I came to my conclusion to carry all three and how I am doing today. Odd for a Craigs List posting eh? Ok God…..I’m always ready to share! I didn’t hold back….I told her the story.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
The point came that I had to decide what I truly believed in and what was I going to stand on. <b><i>Facts, Fiction or Faith?</i></b> </div><div class="MsoNormal">Doctors had <i>Facts.</i> They gave me statistics and scenarios and even people I could discuss them with that had been on the same journey. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
The world had <i>Fiction</i>….was I going to believe what this world was trying to tell me? The lies the enemy was about to put in my head and the insecurity he would try to sell me now?</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
<b><i>Faith</i></b>……the one thing that I knew that I knew that I knew and had not failed me! No, not all my prayers have been answered the way I wanted them to but they had been answered and always to my betterment!</div><div class="MsoNormal">I think we all get to a point in our lives where we are stripped of the exterior and are left to see what truly lives in the inside. Sometimes, we don’t even know what it is until its exposed. Here is what I found:</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i>1. Facts</i>…they constantly change! New discovery, new science and new findings!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i>2. Fiction</i>…it’s what the world would like us to believe and what the enemy speaks!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i>3. Faith</i>….is constant….His word never changes! It is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow! (Hebrews 13:8)</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
So, here I am, on the other side of the story. Yes, you may think it’s easy for me to preach this now but know that there was deep loss that we went through along this journey. The journey….this path you are to walk alone with nobody….but God to look to. I can only tell you what the bible says and I can share my life with you. At the end, you have to decide on your own F word. Which is it?</div><div class="MsoNormal">And I venture to say that yes, sometimes it’s ok to even use the 4<sup>th</sup> F word…..it’s ok to admit that sometimes things just stink! But you'll have to decide at some point leave that spot, wipe the tears and sweat and walk... or even drag yourself out if you have to! I did.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Scriptures to lean on:</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal">Isaiah 54</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-41728660294963748202011-10-03T22:59:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:52:53.082-08:00THE WALK HOME...<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">Again, I was cleaning out closets when I ran across a photo album of the year I studied in Spain. Here I found silly pictures and started leafing through the pages of my past. So lost, alone and unaware. Then I found it! The HOST! Yes, the very host (holy bread) blessed in church to eat as a reminder of His death!! Oh the story!!! Tears filled my eyes and I cried for that girl!!!</div><div class="MsoNormal">While living in Granada in my late teens early 20’s I had been very lost and….searching. I found myself in a world with others on the same journey. I did things teens sometimes do and in positions I stumbled upon. One night, after an evening at some bars, we ended up at a Moroccan Tea shop which are so very popular in Spain. A few hours of chai tea and smoking hash I started a quiet, lovely and picturesque walk to my house. I was blessed to be living with a host family that had a picturesque home right next to The Alahambra and all it’s little shops and old churches. On my walk home I became increasingly paranoid and couldn’t think straight. I quickened my pace and thought about how much this street looked like a back lot of a studio. That it was too picturesque and too perfect. I just knew it had to be a set up by the government. I was so busy convincing myself that I was being watch that I barely noticed it!</div><div class="MsoNormal">A host. Yes, a host…the big white round one with the cross imprinted on it! Yes, the one a priest blesses as Christ’s body for us to share… there on the floor, at 2am, in the dark, in Spain, on the street! What? Surely this was part of the plot I was being set up for right? Paranoia grew. Surely I was hallucinating this! I was too high. Mental note: No more tea and hash for me. So, I kept walking but was getting closer to it and yet it didn’t disappear. Ah, a brilliant thought! It wasn’t there was it? No, it couldn’t be! A plan: I’ll step on it and prove to myself that it’s an illusion! So I walked and tried not to look at it and stepped on it and took another step….I heard it! A very clear and audible crunching sound!!! What??? I pivoted around and stared at it….now behind me….cracked, with a clear shoe mark on it. Broken into two pieces………</div><div class="MsoNormal">I fell to my knee’s, tears fell down my face, and here….it was my turn to break in two!!! Who was I? Lost, in a foreign world, unaware of what my current actions would do in my life so many years later. I refused to believe in this host, on the floor, so I challenged it’s existence. Yet, it still lay there, no broken because of me! He loved me!!! Even if I refused to believe in his existence and chose to challenge it by stepping on it….it remained! I sat there crying and picked it up and ran home! Woke up my roommate to tell him about it…..though not a believer he was clearly moved and at first light….he went to church with me and we sat there quietly.</div><div class="MsoNormal">I’d like to tell you my life changed immediately and I never did anything wrong again! I’d like to tell you that….but it did take me a little longer however, that was the day “that I first believed.” </div><div class="MsoNormal">Here I am 13 years later. On my living room floor, with 3 year old triplets running around and asking me what this white broken thing was. The mercy, grace….how do I explain that to them? “Mami what’s that?”…..all I could mutter… “A present from God.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Now I see how so many times I stepped on a gift, questioned its validity, ignored it’s existence, challenged it’s truth and yet it remained. Broken and stepped upon yet the pure value untouched. Such a testimony to my life….and to yours! </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><u><i><b>Scripture to lean on:</b></i></u></div><div class="MsoNormal">Mark 5: 24-34</div><div class="MsoNormal">John 4</div><div class="MsoNormal">John 9:1-20</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-81754438460417564452011-10-03T22:54:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:53:19.681-08:00Matthew 4:4<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">I attended a new ministry at our church called Celebrate Recovery last night and found myself looking straight into a mirror. My husband told me I would. Have you ever had that moment when you’re minding your own business and doing things you know you “should” do and all of a sudden (ha, like things are by happenstance….nope!) you’re staring straight into a mirror at your own reflection!!! The last person I expected to meet there was myself!!! The one thing I have learned in ministry is that by putting yourself in a world of serving others, you yourself also get served. </div><div class="MsoNormal">So right now, my busiest season with GodChicks right around the corner I start this journey. As I usually do around this time, I ask God to search me and help me bring to light whatever I’m trying to hide in darkness. Never an easy request but always a stretching, growing and beneficial one! So here I was, with my prayer once again and enter CR. In my studies I kept coming across the scripture Matthew 4:4 “We shall not live by bread alone but by the word of God.” So I was sinking deeper into his word and trying to find my life within it. Health and food challenges kept creeping up but I really bring it into focus yet. </div><div class="MsoNormal">For many years I have been under the wonderful leadership of my Senior Pastor Holly Wagner and her amazing journey to health after her breast cancer journey. Yes, I was taking vitamins and yes I had changed many bad health habits but had I really taken things to heart? Now I face myself in this mirror and the clear meaning of Matthew 4:4 ……what had I been living on all these years? Yes, I had always been the girl 25 pounds overweight and since the birth of my beautiful triplets it had only grown. The confidence I’ve always had in who I was now became my crutch and excuse to look at my health. So here I am. Exposed to you and the words I have written for you all you mommy’s to see. I can no longer live on the bread of this world and will feed on something sweeter. Catch me in a year….and hold me accountable and join me at Celebrate Recovery on Thursday nights at Oasis….maybe we can walk the journey together…..after all, don’t girls do everything together? ;) </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Scriptures:</div><div class="MsoNormal">Matthew 4:4 (I don’t think I need much more for now)</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-25179320597953813022011-09-27T22:20:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:53:44.228-08:00A BIG DAY - SCHOOL<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">Today the triplets started preschool full time (5 days a week) and I started Grad School. Such momentous days for all of us and they are not even aware! Made me wonder how many momentous days have gone by in our lives that our heavenly Father has witnessed while we remained unaware. Does He reveal small pieces of the puzzle at a time or do we only have eyes to see the small pieces of the puzzle? I believe it’s a little of both. I say this because I know what I am planning for you," says the <span style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>. <i>"I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future. (Jeremiah 29:11)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I can trust the plans, I can trust the journey, I can trust in Him. After all, look where you’ve come from? Look how far you are? Could we have explained it to you?</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The funny thing is that I actually dislike puzzles. I figure…if I can see the picture on the front cover what is the point of recreating a broken one? It’s not going to suddenly surprise me by the beautiful landscape it becomes. I see the end already. AND the one I’m about to recreate will pale to the cover because mine will have ridges and indentations in it….I fail to see the point. </div><div class="MsoNormal">It is at this very moment that I am reminded that it is all a choice. We are not living to recreate a picture He already see’s. We are creating the original masterpiece and He is watching us birth it with every decision we make! We are the artists, we chose which pieces to put together and with each brushstroke we create a piece of the infinite tapestry!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">For today, I celebrate the start of this journey quietly on my own and know that one day we will all share in the fruit of what it all means. For now, I admire the puzzle pieces I CAN see and look forward to the masterpiece I will see one day. <style>
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</style>Can you see the piece that you are weaving? Can you imagine the bigger picture you’re a part of today? <span style="font-family: Wingdings;"></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Wingdings;"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal">Scriptures to lean on:</div><b>Proverbs 19:21</b> <br />
<i>Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.</i>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-16195011244890907362011-09-27T22:08:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:54:08.198-08:00The happiest place on earth!<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">Today we took the triplets to Disneyland.<br />
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We’ve taken them before but so young they were unaware of what it really was. Today I could see it in their eyes. They took it all in and were in awe of this wonderful place Mami & Papi knew about . They met princesses, Buzz Light Year, Mickey and all the magical characters they loved. I could see the wonder in their eyes. Not just the joy they were experiencing but the magical wonder. I am sure their 3 year old minds had questions such as… where are we? Are they real? Why are they so big? But not one question was asked! They just smiled and hugged them and clapped and danced around. Accepting them for what they were and celebrating their “realness” in front of them! They trust us completely and never worry about what we are presenting to them. <i>For we live by faith, not by sight. (2Corin5:7)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal">We can all learn from this trust and faith but what really got me was later.<br />
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We were standing in line for a ride. They were excited and couldn’t stand still. They were talking over each other and not letting us answer the flurry of questions. We just looked at each other and laughed as other people stared at the crazy chaos of our every day lives. Then…….I began to cry!<br />
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Now, most of you mommies know me. I’m not the easiest egg to crack and even I didn’t understand. It was a deep sadness that I had tapped into and was unaware it was there!<br />
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I had flashbacks of going to Disney with my parents and as an only child I would stare at what appeared to be happy families, laughing, enjoying the moment and talking to their kids. My father had lived a hard life and was a hard man and carried an intense mood that spilled onto us everywhere we went. We pretended to be a happy family but it felt like a façade and deep sadness lived inside. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Here I am……26 plus years later and I could see this one only child staring at us and smiling.<br />
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I saw myself in his eyes and another wall was instantly broken. What had stood tall in my heart for over 3 decades melted. One second I acknowledged a deep hurt, the next second brought down a wall and the third second filled it with deep joy!<br />
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I was now part of this happy family I had wondered about so many years ago! When did I switch spots?! THANK YOU JESUS!! Was it appropriate to fall on my knees at Disneyland and praise God?! …. Don’t hold your breath…. I did! I hugged my kids and told my husband about it. The twinkle in his eyes, as I told him what had just transpired quietly in front of him, confirmed it all for me. I saw nothing but pride, love and understanding and a “welcome home” in his eyes. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">That day Disneyland held true to their slogan “The happiest place on earth” never rang so true. But the reality is that this could have happened at any time at any place. I just needed the eyes to see and the ears to hear…..We all have it at our grasp. We just need to look at the picture again and decide what side we're standing on. Are you living on the side of the past or the present? </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><u><b>Scripture to lean on:</b></u></div><div class="MsoNormal">“Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road. (Mark 10:52)</div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6238139238223333386.post-51220100552710982342011-09-27T22:00:00.000-07:002011-11-30T23:54:40.690-08:00You have triplets?????<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal">The question I get several times a week.<br />
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I never really know where these start-up conversations are gonna go. It could be plain curiosity, awe, delight, a few times disgust and many more than I can ever count a true ministry moment. Regardless of what my day has looked like, where I’m going and what mood the kids are in ..I have learned to listen to the words that they are NOT saying. I take a moment to chat with them and be open with my story. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><div class="MsoNormal">They say that most people aren’t as open to talk about Christianity or open to be invited to church but my life story has Jesus written all over it so I can share that! I don’t have to speak scriptures, wear a cross or tell them what I do for a living. All they have to do is hear my story unfold and the fruit overflow. I like answering questions about how I do things, how tired I must be, how much help I must have, how tired I must be, how overwhelmed I must feel......<i>how tired I must be</i>!<br />
What keeps me going?? There is an alternate story the enemy tried to tell! <i> </i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
<i>The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. (John 10:10)</i> The raw truth is that my story could have been different. Regardless of how tired, stressed, busy and unappreciated you must feel think of the alternative! My husband and I could still be trying to have a family and praying for an answer but instead, we have been given a gift (though bigger than we had ever prayed for) so why would I now turn to Him and complain????<br />
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Don’t get me wrong…. Of course we have our moments…after all, we're human…. but I refuse to dwell there!! Who wins?? Instead, I give myself a minute….cry out to God about how tired, stressed, busy or unappreciated I feel and ask for His strength not mine! Then I spend 3 minutes thanking Him for just that.....the fatigue, stress and the business of my life!!! What else could I be doing now if the alternative had been true?! </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">This world can quickly turn your biggest blessing into your biggest thorn if you allow it to. So my advise….take a minute and talk to those who stop you because you may be planting a seed or watering a seed but truly they are reminding YOU of your very own story and blessings! Who are you talking to today and what are you focusing on? Remember, the story is not about you....it might just be about that divine meeting and that person that was specifically sent to you!</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><u><b>Scriptures to lean on:</b></u></div><div class="MsoNormal">Don't forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it! (Hebrews 13:2)</div>Bonnie Brocatto Powellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16692157774828608814noreply@blogger.com0